I'm feeling the effects of society's diminishing values and honesty. I'm sick and tired of people not caring about the long-term effects of their actions and words. These days, hypocrisy seems like it's behind nearly every door I open and that saddens me. Is it really possible that people could look you right in the eyes and tell you that you mean more than anything to them -- that they love you more than anything -- just for you to see them turn around and throw it all into an infinite abyss? I guess there will always be that risk when you put all of yourself into another person.

Friends and family have reassured me that not everyone is like this. There’s a legend out there that says there are still actual people who care about their promises and morals. Where are those people? Here's what I figure: there is selfishness everywhere, and unfortunately, you have to learn to be able to spot it before it hits you square in the face. I've seen some of the worst hypocrisy in my life recently, and I guess I just have to accept that some people are wired to repeat their mistakes over and over until the day they die. You can hope that people will change, but it has to be THEIR decision to do so, not yours. And some people will never change, and we have to learn to accept it. You can try to show them the light, but it comes to a point where we cannot do anything to help those people. It gets to the point where you have no choice but put your hands up and walk away. You have to refuse to allow those people's mistakes to spill over and burn you again.

I knew that the stove was hot... but I touched it anyway, and it burned me. I should've known it could happen again, but I didn't want to believe it. Trying to convince myself that our love was strong enough to save us, I lived in denial and what did I do? I touched that stove again, and low and behold, it burned me again! Well, here's where I put my foot down and say NO. I do deserve better... that's what everyone else keeps telling me. Well, I'm hanging onto that idea. I'm beginning to see what everyone's telling me...

In the end, they're just lying to themselves.

"You say you fell while holding diamonds in your hands.
It's your fault for running holding diamonds, I said.
And I offer no sympathy for that.
I hear that it was you died alone.
And I offer no sympathy for that.
It's better off I sparkle on my own.

And someday, love will find me in the rough.
Someday, love will finally be enough."

~Anna Nalick, "In the Rough"